Music for motivation, music for relaxation.

 

 Listening to music can bring about strong emotions, memories, dancing, fun and an escape from the mundane. It can be used in many different ways. If you are only listening to music when you drive your car then perhaps taking the time to listen to music you like could make a positive enhancement in your day to day activities.

Have you ever been driving when a song you love comes on the radio and you turn it up, smile, sing at the traffic light and suddenly feel upbeat and excited? This is a unique experience. I was once in an art class where while we painted they played different types of music to see if it changed the way we painted. We were listening to music that was classical, smooth listening music, rock, pop then sad love songs. We were amazed at the power of music and its relation with our actions and feelings.

Have you ever been been listening to music playing in a car park or out the front of a shopping centre? Try to notice this next time. You will find that old style or classical music is played in these areas, why? To put off young people hanging out in these areas, if they don’t like the loud music playing they won’t want to stay in that area. This music also encourages those near it and listening to it to remain calm.

-Using music for relaxation-

That got me thinking, listening to music could help calm us down when we are feeling stressed and overwhelmed. Think about what music you like, what’s your favourite sounds, songs, musicians and instruments? It doesn’t matter if your don’t play an instrument, if you can’t hold a tune, if you don’t know the names of the songs or the bands playing them. All that matters is that you find which music works best for you in terms of relaxation. You might find nature sounds and classical music relaxing, you may prefer music that is upbeat and great to dance to, you might prefer slow, smooth love songs, perhaps the classics or even the 80’s. All you need to do is start listening to music whenever possible to find what suits you. Once you find the music that relaxes you take just a few minutes each day to sit or lie down in a comfortable position, close your eyes and allow yourself to listen, really listen to the music and breathe deeply. It can have a very positive effect, very quickly.

– Using music for motivation-

If music can relax us then it must have the ability to motivate us right? Say you have housework to do, you don’t want to do it, you put it off, make excuses etc. Try filling your house with music that you feel motivates you. For me it’s upbeat music that I know most of the words too and also like to dance to. It makes it easier to motivate yourself to do the task if you can be listening to music as you do it. This isn’t just for chores but for exercising, studying, working, building a roof, whatever!

Music can be fun, powerful, happy or sad but it can also help us relax, listen, dance and even motivate us to get tasks done.

                                               Try bringing more music into your life today.

RIHANNA – PLEASE DON’T STOP THE MUSIC :

I wanna take you away, let’s escape into the music

DJ, let it play, I just can’t refuse it, like the way you do this

Keep on rockin’ to it, please don’t stop the

Please don’t stop the music

My husband and I reckon that music was way better in the 80’s and the 90’s. Just more fun, catchy and better to dance to. What do you think?

I have just started to realise…. Life is short!

 

Lately I have been hearing about nothing but sickness, cancer and death. Sounds awful I know but it is a reminder that nobody knows how long we all have in this life.  So we should celebrate the time we have and spend as much time as possible with those we love. 

 

I started reminding myself of this in the last three years or so. It really does put things in perspective in a good way. So I may be really worried, stressed and anxious about something but then I think will this matter in five, ten or twenty years time is it a matter of life and death? Most of the time it’s not. There is an amazing book called ‘Change your Thinking by Sarah Edelmen.  In it she says, ‘90% of the things we worry about will never come to pass’. This is so true.

 

I love this and I have put it up around my house to remind me of it everyday. The book helps us to see things in a different light. It made me realise that we are the controllers of our thinking!! Really, we are despite what happens to us or around us we can always be in control of our thoughts, that is pretty amazing. We can’t totally control what’s going to happen, we can’t control or change what others do but we can control our thoughts in any given situation. We have the power, feels good doesn’t it!! 

 

So I wanted to try it out so I thought about something that drives me insane, often and annoys me just thinking about it. Traffic, hopeless drivers, people that cut you off or drive so close they are nearly in your boot, grrrr that really makes me mad. Really I hardly ever yell, scream or name call at all but when I am driving I believe I morph into a different person.  I have no empathy and no patience I name call, call out as if the person can totally hear me, shake my head, roll my eyes. I must look very funny at the traffic lights! 

 

So when I was driving the other day I reminded myself that I alone control my thoughts. It didn’t take long for someone to cut me off, not indicate at a roundabout and tailgate. But I stayed calm, well much calmer than normal. I took big calming breaths through my diaphragm and told myself that I don’t know what has just happened in that person’s life before they cut me off. They may be on their way to a hospital, a sick relative, they may have just been fired, cheated on, found out a love one died. I don’t know because I am in my car, they are in theirs. For whatever reason they are not driving safely and putting all the road users at risk but I can choose to stay calm. I can choose to feel empathy for this person who is obviously not very happy with something. By doing this I can stop an accident from happening. I can at least drive safely trying to avoid them and protect my family. It was powerful and it did work, try it and let me know how you go??

 

I am over petty fights, particularly those with love one’s. They are pointless and just make everyone feel awful. People will upset us, put us down or annoy us but we can choose how to respond. Instead of an argument we can choose to express our feelings by having a calm communication with the person. Sometimes it is simply better to agree to disagree rather than be stubborn. Stubborn people are not happy people. I have seen a friendship that has been broken after twenty years over one argument. One argument where one person would not back down, would not agree to disagree and the friendship is over! What is the point of that, what are they trying to prove?? On their deathbed will they say, ‘Wow I’m so glad I lost my best friends and I refused to let that argument go, I am so proud of myself’. No way, they will be ashamed, they will think of all the fun times together they missed out on and can’t get back, ever. 

 

I don’t want to win an argument I want to be heard, fix the relationship and not waste my short life with petty nonsense. I want to love strongly and be loved and treasured in return. I want to tell my family how much they mean to me all the time incase it is the last time. I don’t want to think, I wish I said this, I wish I said that or I wish I could hug them one last time. 

 

So today and everyday tell the people you love that you love them no matter what. Kiss your partner a little bit longer, hug your kids a little bit tighter, text or ring people just to show them that you care. We don’t know how long we have all got but we have now, this very moment to tell others how we feel, to make amends and to let go of the petty little things. 

 

Sing it out loud as Nickelback do:

          

     If today was your last day

And tomorrow was too late

Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

Would you live each moment like your last?

Leave old pictures in the past

Donate every dime you have?

If today was your last day

Goodbye My Twenties :(

                                 ‘Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words
That you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inner visions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins’  sang by Natasha Bedingfield

Recently I had my birthday and I had to kiss my twenties goodbye. It was the first time that I had not been happy about my birthday coming. I normally wonder about the gifts I will receive, wait in anticipation for the clothes or shoes I had picked out. But this year I just felt sad. I think I feel like this because leaving your twenties is a scary thought. I have always used excuses of age when falling over, being silly, when I don’t fully understand what is happening and when I am unable to join in on a conversation about politics. I always said, I am only a little girl, I am the youngest or I am a teenager we do stupid things. Then I graduated to I only just became an adult then it was, I am only in my twenties what do you expect but now leaving my twenties I feel there are no excuses left. No excuses as to why I don’t know who is in which political party, or why I don’t know what happened from the news last night or for why I can’t tell you what was on channel two last night etc. Saying hey, I’m only 30 just doesn’t mean the same thing. It doesn’t really mean anything at all. I can’t blame my young age as a factor anymore or my lack of knowledge for anything. I have been voting since I was 18 I should know by now what that’s all about. I should probably be able to watch an a current affairs show without being bored right? I should know which cutlery to use next at a fancy restaurant, I should read the world news section of the paper rather than the entertainment section or worse the comics. I occasionally fill in a crossword, word fill in or find a word but these are mainly the ones in my trashy magazines rather than the newspapers. But that’s me it’s who I am. I can be stubborn I only want to watch, be involved in or see things that appeal to me. It’s not to be rude or difficult. It’s more about feeling that life is short and I don’t want to spend it doing things that I have no interest in.

Maybe that’s what leaving your twenties does mean?? Maybe it means the point of life when you realise your likes and dislikes or the things you will put up with along with the things you won’t! Like finally finding yourself or coming into your own as they say. I think that over the last three years I have grown, I have matured, I have begun the process of finding myself. I have changed the way I speak, the way I write and the way I view things, in a really good way. My IQ probably hasn’t increased but my understanding of my self has.

I have found hobbies that I really like that’s something I’ve never really had before. My favourite is that I found writing! I found how much I like to write, be published and feel important in some way. I found I like to write about all different things from serious topics to funny ones. This has even turned into casual work for me.

I found that it is amazing but difficult being a Mum and while that is an extremely important role in itself we need something else as well. I need to be me still, to do things just for me so I don’t lose myself in the vacuum of parenting.

I should be proud of where I am. I should be proud that I am married to the boyfriend I had from 17 years old, that we have a gorgeous, healthy little boy, that we have a lovely house and that we have great families. I am proud of these things they mean the world to me. I may still feel like I am 12 but maybe we all do, maybe that’s ok?

I am happy with who I am now even if I don’t want to leave my twenties! It’s happened and I am ok. I got amazing presents including lovely surprises from my husband and I still have some birthday money left to spend which is still just as exciting as when I was 12.

So this song sums up what I have learnt over the past few years. It doesn’t make me Einstein but it helps me be me, so maybe that’s enough. Maybe like Peter Pan I just don’t want to grow up but does anyone really?

Sang by Des’ree:

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know love will save the day

Time asks no questions it goes on without you
Leaving you behind if you can’t stand the pace
The world keeps on spinning can’t stop it if you tried to
The best part is danger staring you in the face

So tell me how did other’s feel about leaving their twenties??

P.S I want to wish my hubby a very Happy Birthday coming up and remind him that we have so much to be proud of and grateful for.
I am so proud of his Daddy skills and how well he is doing at work! We love you Daddy xo

I’m grateful for Grandparents!

 Sing like Sister Sledge: “We are family, get up everybody and sing”!

I never met my Mum’s Dad and I was very young when my Dad’s Father (Pop)passed away. I can remember some things about Pop like him working in the garden putting in beautiful flowers whenever we were over to visit. He was tall and thin just like my Dad and I.  Pop idolised my Nana, he thought he was the luckiest guy in the world to have her as his wife, he was always calling her pet names that embarrassed her lol.

I would have loved to meet my Mum’s Dad I have heard great things about him and seen pictures he looked like such a friendly man and he was. He was the local bus driver and people in the area knew him well. He lived for his children. Nana was very fashionable her clothes would still be in fashion if she were alive today. She always had shiny high heels and clip on earrings in every colour and size available. She loved playing card games and was really good at them. She would have visitors come to stay often.  She found beauty in living things such as flowers, nature and fruits, she adored shopping.

My Granny (Mum’s Mother) was so like my Mum that she was the only other person I would stay with if Mum wasn’t there. I was a real woose, still am lol. I remember that Granny would pick me up from preschool and we would sit out the front of a little shop eating hot chips until my Mum would come and pick us up. Granny would get two buses and a train to come and see us. She could make up amazing stories off the top of her head. She was born to be a Grandma and my Mum is too!

Grandparents can be great for your child and great for you. My little man is very lucky to have all four of his grandparents involved in his life. As a Stay at home Mum they have been an absolute godsend to me and my son. They provide constant love, support and guidance. They provide free babysitting, love your child more than words can say, they help around the house, provide free counselling, behaviour management and often food!

They are just a phone call away when you have been up all night with a little one, you are up to your eyeballs in poo and your washing machine has just stopped working. They have life experience, they can mend practically anything, they can teach your child gardening and they have the patience to line up at an event that the parents probably wouldn’t. They bring you frozen dinners when someone is sick, they bring you some nappies when you were just about to race to the shops and they never get tired of listening to your rants about how fabulous your little one is because they believe it too.

Grandparents somehow provide a certain type of wisdom that parents can’t provide. When I am stressed, feel awful or just need some time out their the one’s I call.  Knowing they are only a phone call away helps me through each day.

My Mum aka Granny has a saying on her fridge it goes like this:

                  ‘Grandchildren are God’s reward for being parents’ .

 Lol this is so true and I also believe that being in their grand child’s life makes the grandparents, feel young, stay young and still feel important no matter what their age.

Grandparents may pull your child’s cheeks, they may embarrass them, they may even spoil them rotten but isn’t that what they are for?

                                     So let’s hear it for Grandparents!

             As Pink sang, “just come on and come on and raise your glass”
                       

The Toddler Tango

Since the day my toddler was born I was waiting to be able to dance with him. I knew that it would be a long wait but that someday the day would come and that it would be epic! That day came just about a month ago and it was everything I had wished for and more.  It was like he went to bed one night then suddenly woke up and decided he wanted to dance. 

 

 I have been trying to encourage him to dance I know that he would know the actions to a lot of songs already and he loves songs, rhymes and watching the wiggles and play school. From being a childcare person I probably know most nursery rhymes, songs and actions off by heart so I think even at two my son does also. I teach him a song and actions once and then he just knows it. It’s amazing how quickly they can pick these things up. 

 

We were watching the wiggles dance and he started to copy what they were doing so I joined in and he found it hilarious. We held hands and danced non stop until his sleep time. It was so therapeutic for both him and me. I remember us laughing so much that we were falling over. His eyes were lit up and twinkling, his cheeks were red, his shirt and hair wet but he was having the time of his life and so was I. During that time I forgot about my worries, my housework and enjoyed every second of it. It is a memory I will treasure forever. 

 

We dance each day together now we have a whole little concert going and are now performing this to his Daddy and all the grandparents. Whenever my son feels like dancing he grabs my hands and says, ‘Mummy dance’ or he will call out ‘sleeping bunnies’ which is the first dance that we do. No matter what I am doing or where we are I try to drop everything and dance with my little man. I want to dance with him while he wants to dance with me because I know that won’t be for long. 

 

So now I must confess 5 things: 

1) that I have done this in a major shopping centre

2) that some days we dance so much I am still in pj’s at lunch time. 

3) I have answered the front door like this when something was delivered 

4) that I don’t care who saw and I am not embarrassed at all because 

5) I had ball! ( the delivery guy got a laugh out of it too) 

 

Try this with your kids it really makes you feel good, brightens your day and your kids will love you sharing this with them. 

 

We have gone through different styles of music not just the kiddie stuff but ‘RnB’, classical, pop and even rap which he found hilarious. 

 

It’s easy to add instruments to this, dancing ribbons or air guitars. We even made our own drum and maracas. (Hint: one small container full of rice isn’t very loud, a container full of uncooked pasta is, therefore go with the rice).  Using puppets that relate to the songs works really well too, even using your child’s teddies would work.   

 

The other day I got out the broom and taught him how to limbo, another day I used a skipping rope and used it to make waves for him to jump over as we danced. 

 

Try it, pick out some fun music, turn it up and dance like no one is watching, who cares if you are good at it or not your children certainly won’t. It’s also providing great exercise that is actually fun. Best thing is after all this dancing my little man sleeps like a log! 

 

 

As Jamiroquai sang,”Dance, nothing else for me to do but dance, off these bad times I’m going through, just dance, got canned heat in my heels tonight baby”. 

 

 

 

‘Food glorious food’

You wouldn’t think it by looking at me but I have a love of food. Because I am naturally slim I never worried about how often or what I ate. That may sound lucky but now that I am growing up ( I use that term loosely) I have begun to realise that although I won’t put on weight I may get unwell in the future from my eating habits. Luckily since I had my little boy two years ago I have lost a lot of my appetite! Maybe it’s because parents don’t have the time to eat or maybe because meal times are no longer calm and fun but for some reason I am just not as hungry anymore.

Despite loving any type of food particularly chips, chocolates, oysters and prawns I hate cooking, anything, ever! I know cooking, cooking segments and cooking shows have absolutely taken off but I’m sorry I have no interest at all. Sorry to all you master chef lovers out there but I don’t want to watch someone cooking in person or on TV. But I am more than happy to eat it lol.

My little man loves his food too, perhaps he will enjoy cooking in the future, fingers crossed. He starts off using his Thomas the Tank engine cutlery set but it’s not long before he decides its much faster and he can stuff more in by just using his hands. I watch him sometimes when he eats and he is so in the moment with it and enjoying every bit. Makes the bits he throws onto the floors and the walls worth it.

With food he is at what I call the easier stage. I don’t need to breast feed, I don’t need to purée everything, I don’t need to buy expensive kid food pouches or bottles, he can feed himself and will normally try anything. The best thing of all he can eat what we eat. No more making two dinners each night yay! He is a good boy he loves his veggies especially corn on the cob, he will have that every night.

When your child first starts eating at around 6 months it takes up a lot of time in your day. The preparation takes longer, you need to hold them and feed them, they take a long time to eat and will often just spit it out in disgust. Everything has to be puréed and bland as. Then you have to also be aware of what foods you can introduce at certain ages and hope and pray that they are not allergic to foods and be extra careful that they don’t choke. It’s a tough time particularly when you don’t enjoy being in the kitchen and they don’t even have teeth!

I remember stressing about him having too much or not enough, worrying about if he doesn’t have a full tummy will he keep waking up all night. Then everyone is telling you what to feed your baby, what to try and how often. Having fresh fruit all the time means going to the shops every second day and nappy changes are different altogether when they start food it’s quite a shock at first! The pressure felt like it was on so I went to the baby health clinic and the lovely lady working their told me that my son is very healthy and happy and that I should be proud of myself. At the time it felt like the unease and the responsibility was never going to end but it did and I did feel the weight lift off my shoulders. I tried to go with the flow and convince myself that each child is completely unique and so there is no hard and fast rules. If he is so happy and so loving I must have done something right.

A very good thing that comes out if all this is that I am eating better. The beautiful fresh fruit is there, it’s washed and its easy to eat or take with you on the go. As I wash and cut up fruit for my son I will also eat it and he loves that we eat together. He has actually helped me to rediscover fruit  and how yummy it can be. Well I guess the Wiggles have helped me with that too. ‘Fruit salad, yummy, yummy’. 

If you don’t behave i will….um….i will, actually what will i do???

As a Child Care worker I worried about how to deal with inappropriate behaviors. The rules are firm, don’t touch a child, yell at them, embarrass them in front of others, don’t refer to the child as naughty, annoying or bad.

 

By the time I went on maternity leave we were told not to put children on time outs as parents had complained! Are you kidding me WHAT??

 

I know that children should not be facing a wall for half a lesson but I give my toddler two-minute time outs at home simply to calm him down and give him time to think about his actions.

A time out can simply refer to taking a child away from the situation to another activity at least then they learn that behaving in such a way is not appropriate. 

 

Children these days are aware of our limited conquences for negative behavior  more than we realize.  In schools and Childcare centers you will often hear a child say, ‘I’m going to tell my parents you got angry at me’. Most staff get to know parents so well they know which ones will agree with them and which ones really will be annoyed.

 

I believe that if you place your child into someone’s care that you are allowing them to also teach your child how to act with others particulary when it is not one on one care. However I also believe this should be agreed upon in advance.

 

When anyone enrolled at my child care centre I would give them a run down of such policies to check that they were on board with this. If they are opposed to detention or time out or exclusion from a particular activity then I would ask them to suggest what would be an appropriate consequence. Some parents would boarder on the strict approach ‘give them a slap’, AHHH, NO, we are not doing that to, ‘he was just mucking around I’m not paying childcare fees for my child to sit on time out’. Often such parents would back down or if not if a situation with their child did occur I would ring the parent ASAP and tell them what’s happening. In the end it is their child and it is up to them to decide but not many want this phone call whilst at work. I guess it comes down to trust. Do you trust those taking care of your child?

 

I think discipline is hard these days, it’s a fine line. All of us working with children are scared of litigation in its many forms and the question, ‘who was responsible’?

 

Litigation is at an all time high. I remember seeing on the news a few months back about a student getting sued for knocking into another student during a sport game and injuring them. Come on, are you joking, that is ridiculous with any sport there is an element of danger but isn’t that just life!! What is that teaching our children, the leaders of our future about life and consequences? How will this help them cope in the work place?

 

What do you guys think? If your child misbehaves at child care or school what happens? ? Do you know the school or childcare policy on behavior?

 

 

 

 

And do you agree with this approach?

 

Thanks,

 love SupahAnnie xo

 

Hi, welcome to my blog!!

Hi people,

I’m a friendly and bubbly Stay at home Mum to a gorgeous but crazy and clingy toddler. I am emotional, a self confessed worry wart, but i love to laugh! I am married to the guy I met when I was just 17. I have worked in all forms of childcare with all ages.

I am interested in card making, meditation and psychology, and also children and their learning. I love designing rooms in my house, finding a bargain everywhere i go and finding out ways to make household chores easier, even with a toddler.

Join me as i look into Childcare centre issues, schooling issues, staying sane as a stay at home Mum (well trying to), exploring making home life easier and more orgainsed and bringing up my little boy. Has working in childcare prepared me for this? I guess we’ll soon find out! XO